The Ship The Orange Mecha!
It is stealthy & unarmored...
But its water pressure shifts between slow drip and power wash!
The Mission The kobolds have been sent to an overgrown spaceship
in order to make friends!

The Adversary They're challenged by Gezurywa, a Pirate Swashbuckler!
They're in it for the aesthetic, and like to show off to the point where their effectiveness is limited. If they were better at being an actual pirate, they'd be a captain by now.
 The stats of the pirate:
Order: 3, Chaos: 4, Brains: 3, Body: 3

The Kobolds
Rizaka
Kobold Politician
  • Order: 3
  • Chaos: 3
  • Brain: 2
  • Body: 6
Potion of Healing
Restore 1 lost Body point. Using counts as an Event but no roll is needed unless it's contested.
Itonromu
Kobold Spy
  • Order: 2
  • Chaos: 5
  • Brain: 3
  • Body: 4
Pocket Sand!
Yell 'Pocket Sand!' to count a successful Body attack against you as a mixed success.
Domuryp
Kobold Wizard
  • Order: 3
  • Chaos: 2
  • Brain: 4
  • Body: 5
Book of Convoluted and often Contradictory Regulations
This staple of lawyermancy can be used to confuse a being into believing they need to comply with the wielder's demands for one event. This does nothing if they are ordered to harm (or commit actions that will lead to harm, like stepping into an airlock...) themselves or an ally. After this time they become resentful that they were ordered around and are likely to retaliate.
Reusable
Tonigep
Kobold Performer
  • Order: 1
  • Chaos: 5
  • Brain: 4
  • Body: 4
Jar of ... Something
Throw it (Body/Chaos) at another character to make them spend an Event cleaning it off, or throw it at the floor to make a ten-foot circle of difficult terrain.
Mawo
Kobold Artificer
  • Order: 3
  • Chaos: 5
  • Brain: 4
  • Body: 2
Potion of Random Probability
Anything can happen when this potion is taken! Anything! More specifically, the character's Chaos Stat is temporarily increased by one (1) until they take a nap. The character and GM are encouraged to describe the most unusual situations whenever the player makes a Chaos roll.
Pozop
Kobold Rogue
  • Order: 3
  • Chaos: 4
  • Brain: 3
  • Body: 4
Guide to Scenic Vistas That Certainly Won't Kill You
This booklet us published by a local tourist board and paints an image of the kobolds' destination as seen through rose colored glasses. It may be used to subtract 1 from any uncontested roll once per nap, but is completely useless after the mission has ended and the kobolds return home.

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Ultra-Quickplay Rules

Completing a task (making an attack, cleaning a surface, activating a device) is an Event. If you're the first person to say they're doing something, your Event goes first.

To complete a task, combine two of your stats (Order or Chaos + Brain or Body) and roll 2d6.
If you roll under, you succeed; over, you fail; hit the target number, you get a partial success.

If you take damage, temporarily reduce your Brain or Body stat by 1, depending on what kind of damage you took.
You can regain stats by taking a nap.

If you use a reusable gadget, you have to take a nap before you can use it again. If someone else hands you a reusable gadget, you have to take a nap before you can use it. (You can use non-reusable gadgets right away.)