The Ship The Ancient Phlogiston!
It is maneuverable & unarmored...
But is too cold!
The Mission The kobolds have been sent to a derelict time vortex
in order to ...well, they weren't paying attention, so don't tell them, but they're supposed to rediscover lost technology!

The Adversary They're challenged by Gerynumu, a Thing in a Jar and their minion, Alien Researchers!
Its jar is fogged up, so it's not easy to see what's inside. Don't leave it near machinery or electronics; it can connect wirelessly to anything it can sense nearby, but it needs a hardwired connection to assert direct control.
Their minion: They're kobold-sized, but with bulbous heads and large, onyx eyes. They like to reinforce their superiority by researching other species' 'flaws'. They... don't ask for volunteers.
 The stats of the thing:
Order: 3, Chaos: 2, Brains: 6, Body: 2
The stats of the aliens:
Order: 4, Chaos: 4, Brains: 5, Body: 3

The Kobolds
Beuzyd
Kobold Blood Hunter
  • Order: 5
  • Chaos: 4
  • Brain: 3
  • Body: 2
"The Book"
If thrown at a being that is in violation of an applicable law or regulation (player picks, GM decides after "The Book" is thrown whether it works), throwing "The Book" at that being does 1 Brains damage. This counts as an event but no roll is needed. Regardless of the results, "The Book" is not sturdy enough to be thrown twice.
Suz
Kobold Druid
  • Order: 3
  • Chaos: 3
  • Brain: 4
  • Body: 4
Potion of Hangovers
If used in conjunction with a Chaos roll meant to do damage, a Mixed Result or better will do a point of Brains damage in addition to any other results.
Fesar
Kobold Politician
  • Order: 2
  • Chaos: 4
  • Brain: 4
  • Body: 4
Guide to Scenic Vistas That Certainly Won't Kill You
This booklet us published by a local tourist board and paints an image of the kobolds' destination as seen through rose colored glasses. It may be used to subtract 1 from any uncontested roll once per nap, but is completely useless after the mission has ended and the kobolds return home.
Geky
Kobold Paladin
  • Order: 4
  • Chaos: 2
  • Brain: 4
  • Body: 4
Potion of Gym Membership
Temporarily adds one (1) to the character's Body Stat, even if it's already at maximum. This effect ends when the character takes Body damage or a nap.
Dyzum
Kobold Blood Hunter
  • Order: 0
  • Chaos: 5
  • Brain: 4
  • Body: 5
Marwyse's Overdue Library Book
The wielder can use this book to subtract 1 from a Brains based roll once per nap, but each time they do so they take 1 point of Brains damage over the guilt of having not yet returned the book. This damage occurs after the results of the Brains roll are resolved.
Reusable
Bel
Kobold Cook
  • Order: 3
  • Chaos: 5
  • Brain: 2
  • Body: 4
Huge Goggles
If you take Body damage, roll 1d6; on a 6, the lenses of the Goggles break until you take a nap.
Reusable

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Ultra-Quickplay Rules

Completing a task (making an attack, cleaning a surface, activating a device) is an Event. If you're the first person to say they're doing something, your Event goes first.

To complete a task, combine two of your stats (Order or Chaos + Brain or Body) and roll 2d6.
If you roll under, you succeed; over, you fail; hit the target number, you get a partial success.

If you take damage, temporarily reduce your Brain or Body stat by 1, depending on what kind of damage you took.
You can regain stats by taking a nap.

If you use a reusable gadget, you have to take a nap before you can use it again. If someone else hands you a reusable gadget, you have to take a nap before you can use it. (You can use non-reusable gadgets right away.)